My parents raised me not to bully others. They also raised me to stand up to bullies. They taught me not to start a fight. They also taught me that if someone started one with me, that I was to finish it–because “we don’t run from anyone!” They taught me to defend others and speak up for the voiceless.

I was never bullied as a child. Some tried and then learned quickly that I was not the one to push around. I also never bullied anyone or started fights. I was the child who stood firm in “if you don’t mess with me then I won’t mess with you” and I still stand firmly in this belief. My entire life so far I have made sure that I defended those that could not fight back and I spoke up for those who felt they did not have a voice.

I never imagined that I would grow up and have to face my own bullies.

What never dawns on us is the fact that the child who was bullied often times grows up to be an even bigger bully. Hence why we are faced with adults who relish in the opportunity to harass, pick on, tease, physically assault, verbally abuse, and psychologically torture other people.

Sadly the bully has never gotten over their own childhood trauma when they were bullied, so they continue the sick and twisted cycle throughout adulthood.

If only they had received the counseling and support they needed as children. We then wouldn’t have to deal with adults storming around like the kids who used to bully them.

Enough is enough.

Ifyou are having issues with a bully you have two options:

  1. Try to ignore them and hope they will go away and leave you alone, or
  2. Stand up to them and make sure that they never try to bully you again

I have dealt with a few bullies so far in my adult life and I have faced them all down. I refuse to be a victim. I refuse to be someone’s physical, verbal, or psychological punching bag. I refuse to allow someone to control me.

If they want a fight they picked the right woman. I will not allow someone to silence me, to dictate what I can do and when I can do it, where I can go and who I can be around. I will not allow someone to dictate the content that I put on my websites, social media, or blogs. I will not allow someone to dictate to me who I am, what I believe, what I think, and what I stand for.

No one has the right to tell me how to dress, what to buy, what to listen to, what to eat or drink. No one controls my mind, my speech, or my body.

No one.

I stand firmly planted in my convictions as a child of God and I don’t care how big and how bad that person thinks that they are, they have no strength and no power that could ever compare to my God.

I am only obedient to one force and that is my Creator. Everyone else can back down, sit down, and be silent.

If you are sick and tired of being pushed around and bullied, I strongly encourage you to stand up, speak out, fight back, and never allow someone to believe that they have any power over you.

If you are being harassed sexually or any other way, speak up and stand up for yourself.

If you are being abused in anyway speak up and stand up for yourself.

A bully only has pseudo-power. It is a veil. Pull it back and stare your bully in their face, and watch them back up and bow down. They don’t want the fight. They want to take the punk route and attack you when you’re not looking, attack you when you’re down on the ground. Punk.

A bully is intimidated by your power and your presence. Don’t let them have any of it. If you weren’t powerful they wouldn’t mess with you. They attack what they can’t have. They try to take what they do not possess. They are weak and miserable so they want you to be in the same miserable state of mind.

Don’t give in and don’t you ever give up!

~Natasha

By Natasha Foreman Bryant
 
 
 I admit that around 2006-2007 I watched the earlier seasons of the Bad Girls Club. I wanted to know what Oxygen was bringing to the table, so-to-speak, and what made these young females so “Bad”. I soon discovered that droves of females claiming to be real women, were lining up to join this show to prove how devious, violent, ruthless, and spiteful they were. They wanted to prove to themselves that they were the hottest, sexiest female on the show, and the one who could curse the most and the loudest, while pretending that they really wanted to fight one or more of the other cast members.
 
 Yeah I got bored of it quickly because I know that the women who aren’t to be messed with don’t go around advertising it for the world, or tooting their own horn. They just confidently sit back and relax.
 
 Little girls throw temper tantrums, play childish games, and do petty things. This is what I saw on the Bad Girls Club, and this is what I saw when I decided to check on the show the other day (now in it’s 11th season). It’s disappointing to see these girls, obviously in pain, obviously battling some childhood or early adulthood trauma, taking out their pain and frustration on others.
 
 Someone let them down early on in their life. Someone didn’t give them a healthy dose of love, attention, affection, and structure growing up. Someone didn’t teach them how to be ladies and mature women. Maybe there are daddy issues, mommy issues, or both. Whatever the problem it runs deep, and when not properly redirected, hurt people will ultimately hurt people.
 
 I always wonder if the cast members from all eleven seasons look back at the episodes they starred in and really reflect upon how they were portrayed, how they acted, and the image that they have left in the minds of their viewers—and the young girls that I’m sure tune in regularly.
 
 The episode that I have shared at the end of this post is a small reflection of what Bad Girls Club has recycled and evolved into after 11 seasons. I tell those so-called “bad girls” and those who walk around thinking they are “bad” to woman up! Your attitude and false image won’t get you far in life. The high you feel tearing others down will still leave you feeling lonely when the cameras aren’t on you, or when your entourage isn’t hanging around egging you on.
 
 [ http://www.hulu.com/watch/539096%5D
 
 
 Copyright 2013. Natasha Foreman Bryant. All Rights Reserved.